| Review
of
Happiness at Work, by Srikumar S. Rao (Hardcover, 2010)
(You can print this review in landscape mode, if you
want a hardcopy)
Reviewer:
Mark Lamendola, author of over 6,000 articles.
I like this book. I believe in its philosophy. Most of it, I have
been practicing for years. It really does work on the job, too.
Here's an example, from years ago. An incompetent boss of mine had
this idea that giving someone a dishonest performance appraisal was a
good way to get employees to work harder because it put fear into them.
He would make up "deficiencies" out of thin air, and if you reacted
strongly he'd write down whatever he had made up and then later tell you
the company isn't sure about your future. He actually began with a blank
appraisal form, and filled it out based on how his imaginative
criticisms stirred a response from the victim.
In my first "appraisal" with him, he tried this with me. Since there
was no basis for his claims, I did not react. Flustered, he asked, "Are
you listening to me? I replied, "You can neither motivate me nor
demotivate me. Thus, this appraisal serves no purpose. Why don't you sit
here and write what you think is correct, and then bring it to me to
sign when you're done? If it's honest, I'll sign it. If it's not, you
can explain to HR that you were unable to conduct a performance review."
I then got up and walked out.
You see, I was happy with my work. The quantity of it was easily
measured, and far more than expected. The quality was also highly
regarded both inside and outside the company, including by major
customers. I was not going to do a better job or work any harder. Nor
was I going to let my boss demotivate me into working less or working
worse.
I was just going to do a job that I enjoyed, regardless of any mind
games or manipulation from a boss. I couldn't help that he was a poor
manager with a poor attitude toward his subordinates, but I could very
much control my own attitude. It's why I got significant raises, despite
rejecting the "appraisal" game. It's also why I was a repeated layoff
survivor there.
At the time of this "review," there were about 15 other people in
this company who had my job title. Three years later, I was the only one
left (those jobs were eliminated, but I was kept on by order of the VP
of our division). Three years after that, we were going through yet
another round of layoffs. I had a new, competent boss by this time (he
was a fine person, and we are friends to this day). I told him I hoped I
would get the axe, instead of a particular coworker who was having
personal difficulties. I got the axe, and was happy when I left the
building that day without a job.
This is not to say I am an enlightened being who is in perfect
control. That is not at all the case. I'm only saying that it is
possible to control your attitude in such a way that you are happy in
conditions that are miserable. This concept is at the heart of this fine
work by Dr. Rao. It is a concept I wish to embrace more fully. His
explanations and examples will be helpful to me in that journey, and I
think they will be helpful to any reader who seeks happiness.
There is much wrong in the world. If we wait for things to "be right"
before we are happy, we will always be waiting. This is not to say we
can never be angry or unhappy. We can, and we should. But as Dr. Rao
points out, happiness isn't a mood. As he points out, the word has been
diluted by misuse to mean "pleased." You can be displeased and happy at
the same time.
Consider the example I gave. I was displeased with this incompetent
boss, but still very happy about my job. His toxic attitude was for him
to have if he wished to have it. I did not wish to have a toxic
attitude, so I recused myself from his toxicity party. His wish to have
a toxic attitude did not compel me to have the same. I could have sat
and absorbed his nonsense, gone away with those thoughts, and become
unhappy. I chose to let him do his thing, while I did mine. And that was
greatly beneficial to me.
In this situation, I was (refer to the book cover), resilient,
motivated, and successful. I know that others who submitted to the
toxicity party process spent days feeling demotivated. They moped and
complained. The thing was, though, they previously enjoyed their work.
They let an incompetent boss take that away from them.
In other situations, people trade their happiness for the sake of
"winning" a squabble with a coworker, neighbor, or other person. They
think if they "win" this squabble, then they will be happy. But
afterwards, they aren't happy because the other person is not happy with
them. So, the hollow "victory" does not produce happiness.
People watch the brainwashing machine (television) and see the "news"
about so many bad things going on (sensationalized to really get you in
the gut, too). Then they feel unhappy.
There are many other examples. The preceding are just my own, to
illustrate an aspect or two of why I believe so strongly in the concepts
of this book. Dr. Rao provides other (better) examples to illustrate the
life-enhancing concepts of this book.
The cadence and tone of Dr. Rao's writing style make this book
pleasurable to read. In the self-help genre, some authors are
well-meaning but so over the top they are obnoxious. Dr. Rao does not
try to wow the reader with "hyped up" speech.
I think one reason this book will be useful to many people in the
American audience is Dr. Rao's perspective. He's from India and thus
from an entirely different culture. The folklore and cultural references
are different and thus provide insight and perspective that will be new
to most Americans. I don't think there's anything earth-shattering or
ground-breaking here, in terms of the actual concepts--if you are from
India.
But most prospective buyers of this book are from a high-pressure
culture that seems geared toward defeating the individual on the deepest
levels. It is natural, but not necessary, to let your perspective be
shaped by this culture. There is another way, and Dr. Rao explains it
well.
This book consists of 230 pages, divided into 35 chapters. That seems
like too many chapters, but the idea here is each chapter is for a
concept you can use. As the concepts are not overly complex, there isn't
a reason for one to take up more than a few pages.
The challenge with these concepts is to be mindful of them when the
right time arises for a given one to be of use in a given set of
circumstances. If you can make a point of doing that, this book will
help you increase your happiness significantly. Even at work. |